Review: Revlon ColorStay Gel Envy in Full House

Hello gentle readers.

Grab a cup of coffee. I'm about to talk your ear off. So to speak.

Revlon ColorStay Gel Envy in Full House. Oy to the vey. This polish. This polish. This polish. This polish. I am gong to begin with a positive comment about this polish because it is going to get ugly, really soon and I don't believe in trashing products but this one is going to get a thorough smack upside the head.

The colour. I love this beautiful turquoise colour.

Now, let's dance.

I shall start with the formula. The overall texture isn't bad, it isn't too thick or too runny but it is hard to work with. This polish is downright cantankerous. As it goes on, it streaks, it likes to drag, it will stack, as you add a second coat. This polish sits down where it is placed and it isn't too prone to flooding or running but I had a lot of cleanup trying to avoid the damned coat stacking issue at the edges. This polish doesn't self level worth a damn and if you don't work swiftly, smoothly and get a nice, even coat with the crappily trimmed brush, gentle reader, you are shit out of luck.

Bubbles. Ah, this polish is so talented at making bubbles. Lots and lots of little bubbles. I can hear Don Ho singing in the background as I type this. You know, I can deal with a lot of flaws in a formula but when a polish bubbles on me in this hardcore fashion, I lose my shit. After I saw the bubbled tar pit on my nails when I finished this manicure, I lost my shit.

Dry time. On the first coat it was very good. Second, not too bad. Add the special top coat that allegedly makes this in to some magical Gel polish of wonder and prepare to throw a fit. Many good top coats can melt, smooth, soothe a polish, tame little wavies, even clean up minor bubbling. The Revlon Gel Envy top coat just bubbles, adding to the bubbly fun then it takes a long, oh so long time to dry. Seche Vite, this stuff isn't. Not only is it slow to dry, it is even slower to cure. I applied this manicure at 4:30 in the afternoon and didn't go to bed until midnight. I woke with some "sheet marks" on my nails.

Really? Really?

Wear time for me was abysmal. This stuff claims up to fourteen days wear. My nails were chipping the next morning.

This is two coats of Revlon ColorStay Gel Envy polish in Full House in all it's streaky, bubbly glory topped with a coat of the "oh-so-special" Gel Envy top coat. And more delightful bubbles.

Just look at these photographs. Just look. What a freaking mess.

And closer...

Now let's talk about removal. This polish is supposed to have a built in base coat. The instructions tell us to apply it to bare nails. Do you know what happens to nails when you apply blue polish without base coat? Fast train to Smurf Town. Blue nails. Nails that look as if they were painted with a coat of sheer blue jelly. My nails were so stained and the blue so deeply embedded that even rigorous buffing couldn't get rid of the stain. My nails are still pale blue. And my nail plates are buffed. Doubly screwed.

Want to see the gross? Bear in mind, the lights under which I shot this photograph washed out a lot of the blue. My nails looked as if they had been washed in a sheer blue tint.

Did I mention that my frakking nails are still frakking blue?

TL/DR: This polish and it's corresponding top coat suck big green ones and you should steer well clear.

If you like Revlon ColorStay Gel Envy polish and it's Top Coat of Doom system, I am happy for you. I don't like it and I can't. Won't recommend it. I'd return these and get my money back but wouldn't you know? The first time in months I dislike something so deeply that I want my money back, I lost my frakking receipt. I never lose receipts. The Universe hates me. And my nails. And my wallet.

Lured in by a pretty blue. I never learn.

Okay. Time to wrap this up. I just can't any longer.


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